Onishanki, ADALEMO SANGO OTTA, Sango Otta (2026)

17/11/2022

A man was tired of Lagos girls, went to his village in Anambra to marry an innocent wife. He got a real village girl, paid her dowry nd brought her to Lagos. When he wanted to make love to her, he found out dat her p***c hair was too much, he then told her to shave it, she replied " sir i no fit shave am oo, dis hair na im make all d boys for village dey call me Afro baby"😁😁🙄🥴🥴

07/11/2022

Nah grace we dey shop
Baba God show me your way

23/07/2022

Werey po l'Eko yi sha
Inside Danfo this morning around 5:30am, a woman was preaching and at one point, she said "what account of your life will you give when you meet God?" Our driver shouted "maa fun ni ti GTB."

Mo fe daku🤣

27/03/2022

Rip to chief ESAYA OF IKORO EKITI

12/02/2022

Someone graduated at the age of 22, but waited 5 years before securing a good job.
Someone became a CEO at 25, and died at 50.
While another became a CEO at 50, and lived to 90 years.
Someone is still single, while someone from his school group has become grandfather.
Obama retired at 55 & Trump started at 70.
Everyone in this world works based on their time zone.
People around you might seem ahead of you & some might seem to be behind you.
But everyone is running their own race, in their own time.
Do not envy them.
They are in their time zone, and you are in yours.
So, relax.
You're not late.
You're not early.
You are very much on time....good morning everyone

09/02/2022

LAUGH WITH 👇
PRINCE ONISHANKI ABEFE AYODELE

🤣🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣

1. If your lady answers her phone in front of you and starts clicking the "volume down" button. That's him my brother.... thats him.
Your deputy is calling...😂😂😂😂
🤣🤣🤣🏃🏾♂🏃🏾♂🏃🏾♂🏃🏾♂ sense go one day kill me🙆

2. Disclaimer!!! If I dated you while we were in secondary school, please don't call me your Ex because I never get sense that time 🤔🤔🤔🤔😜😜😜😜

3. If na yoruba people invent ATM and you go insert card with left hand , the machine go tell u "Insufficient home training😂😂

4. Ghana and their over sabi English, which one is "Na dem dey RASH ES?😁😁😁

5. Not everyone that sends you friend request wants to be your friend, some actually want to install CCTV in your life.🙄😂😂😂😂

6. Its always "Mama I made it".
What about Papa that didn't use condom?
Mtchewww
ungrateful children🤔🤔🤔🚶🚶🚶🚶🚶

7. When your girlfriend is very lazy in doing house chores but very good in bed, your family members will be complaining and you will be like "Hmmm, you people don't know this girl well oo"😫🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

9. Dear GOD IF NA BUTTER GO DELAY MY DAILY BREAD🍞BRING AM I GET BEANS😂😂😂😂
Baba do am quick ooo🙏🙏🙏

10. This Life Have Spoil Finish.
A mother said to her teenage daughter:
I think its right time, we should talk about s*x.
Daughter : Sure mom, what do you want to know?
Mother : Ehh! Ayemi temi bami🙄🙄🙄😏😏😏😏😏

11. Some girls will visit you once with hand bag and take all your properties. If you know any Sandra, please help me beg her to return my Tv remote, 3spoons, and USB cord.🤨
Thank you!!!🙋🙋🙋🙋🙋😥😥😥😥😥

12. I told my wife we should give ourselves new pet names. So I said I would call her "Princess" cos she's always beautiful and gorgeous. I asked her what she would call me and she said "Buhari"😎😚😅😅
😂😂I asked why? and she said "All the things you promised me, you've never done any"🤷🤷🤷🤷🙅🙅🙅🙅🙅

13. When God Wanna Play Your Video On Judgement Day, And It Shows Viewer Discretion +18 Just Jejely Walk To Hell Fire Straight pls dont delay us on the queue.😭😭😭😭🙈🙈🙈🙈😹

14. It's only Nigerian Police that will tell you: “Oga Your plate Number is ABUJA what are you doing in LAGOS you are Under Arrest”.😱😢😢😢😢

15. When you get married to a jealous husband... :/ :(
Husband : hello honey, were are u? :/
Wife : I'm in the church
Husband : give the phone to usher...🤣🤣🤣🤣😳😳😳

16. A Slay Queen At My Back During Lectures Today Shouted "We Can't See Your Voice Sir,
Please Be Loudable''
I’m Still Waiting 4 my turn to faint bcoz dey are fainting according to reg. Number 🙄🙄🙄🙄

17. She told me 8 to 9 rounds is ok. I quickly reminded her that,
"3 Rounds is Enough, the D*ck do not come with power Bank You know"🙄🙄🤦🏻♂🤦🏻♂

18. Women are the best goalkeepers in the world because no matter what you do, the "BALLS" never gets in.... If you know you know😂😂🙄🙄🙄🙄

19. That is how you will visit someone and see a dog without chains and they will be like, don't worry it won't bite you, and I'll be like, come o, are you the dog? Is the dog you? I mean have you been a dog before? I just hate nonsense 😒😒🚶🚶🚶🚶

20. Love will just make you see your girlfriend/boyfriend as the most beautiful girl or the most handsome guy on earth,
Breakup & see how Ugly the idiot is. 😂 😂 😂
Rubbish upon Rubbish!!! 🚶 🚶 🙍

21. She said she knows me well..I said okay if you know me, how many hair do I have in my A**s?? 😳 😳 😆 💔

22. Lagosian will no kee sombori with aso-ebi, which one is Danfo yellow with a touch of cockroach brown.🙆🙆🙆🙅

23. How come you post on your birthday "Wow I can't believe am +1 today" so if you don't believe is now me that will believe abi?!
I can see the stupidity in you..🙄🙄🙄🙄🚶🚶

24. One thing with this FB is that they will read your post without commenting. If they eventually like it, to comment come be war.🤷🤷🤷🙋

25. Yoruba people and their native colour...which one is tomato red....palm tree blue, ewedu green...🤦🤦🤦🏃🏃🏃🏃

26. How do u expect a matured man to marry u when u are busy chewing gum like this 😁😲😁😲😁😲😁😲😁😲😁 in the public🤔🤣🤣🤣

27. It took me almost an hour to write this and u will read and just pass without following my page and profile? I'm still negotiating price with the thunder that will fire u.😂😂😅
Read laugh 😂 and Appreciate

Follow my page 👉 ONISHANKI

Follow my profile 👇
I always try my best to make you guys happy, my jokes are always funny.. If you haven't followed my profile below, that means you are missing alot, those who are already following the profile will testify. Abi You don't want to testify? Follow the profile below for more funny jokes abeg.
FOLLOW 👉 ONISHANKI

06/04/2021

Bonus. 👇

😃😄😃😄😃😄😃😄😃
1)I believe my neighbour has opened a church in his house with his girlfriend. Since 1:00am till now all l have been hearing is*
*"Oh my God! Oh my God!! Oh my God!!!"* 😳🤦🏾‍♂️🙆🏽‍♂️🤷🏽‍♂️😁😅😂🤣🚶🏾‍♂️🏃🏽‍♂️

2)This evening I only have 3 things to say😂😂🤣🤣.*

1.things
2.things
3.things
😂😂😂

3)Go school u say school na scam,now to fill bank teller u de sweat,u're busy writing Eleventeen thousand one hundred & onety one*😆😆😂😂

4)In case somebody calls and claims ownership of this group*
*I want U guys to know that I've used this group to apply for loan o* *and na all of una I take do collateral, na Christmas sales I wan do* *urgently* *Make una no vex abeg*🙏🙏🙏😔😔😔

5) She posted I’m sad. You rush go reply what’s wrong??🙄.
Is like u get 10k that u re not using 🚶‍♂️🚶‍♂️

6)Shebi u know everything bah 💁‍♀️💁‍♀️...*
*Okay, the line that divide your yansh is called what* 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🙈🙈🙈🙈🙄🙄🙄

7) If you see the way she was holding the mic🎤 in church. You will understand why I was asking for her phone number...😋🚶

8)All of you will just be reading my posts. You cannot even say... Oya manage this #1,000 Recharge card.
People ehn!

9)BREAKING NEWS* !!

That patient dog wey dey wait for the biggest bone 👇

*E DON DIE*

🙄🚶🚶🚶🚶🚶

10)My mom kept fish on the table*
*I ate it, now she's asking me to check* *under the table and see*
*If the rat is dead*

11)I wanted to suggest that when one of us in this group is sick, we can go and visit the person with 1 bag of rice, 5 cartons of malt, 12 tins of peak milk, 10 liters of cooking oil, 15 cartons of spaghetti, 3 crates of eggs, 200,000 Top up card and #100000. cash.*
*If we all agree to my suggestion we can start tomorrow. I don't even understand the way my body is doing me, I think I have malaria 🤕🤕🤕🤕😱😱😱*

12)But I'm getting confused oo.*
*Why do women call that period as menstruation period but not womenstruation period?*

*It seems this gender always try to shift everything to the side of the men.*

This must get to Supreme court.
I hate nonsense
Mcteeeew🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️😎😎😎

13)You have four boyfriends, two sugar daddies and you still struggling to subscribe your phone monthly, eeehh..., what a waste of sin?*

🚶🏽‍♂️🚶🏽‍♂️🚶🏽‍♂️🚶🏽‍♂️Mad o😄🏃🏼‍♀️🏃🏼‍♀️

14) Do u remember calling him king and he calls u queen??
Now hold this mic 🎤 🎤 tell the audience, how is the kingdom doing? 🙄

15) When rain falls in Nigeria
MTN - 3G
Airtel - 2G
Glo - Emergency
P***s - 4G
😔😔🏃 🏃

Ladies how come😏

16)*As precious hear 35k for short time, she run comot for shiloh go run am*😂😂😂😂

This life nor balance sha

17)You dey pray for millions but you dey use student account, where the money go enter?*🤣

18) Motivational speaker: I started as a thief and now I have my own police station😅😉🏃‍♀️

19)Nah Monday morning I go do my wedding. Yes! u must choose between me and ur work😒😌

20) *Things hard ooo 😟😭*
*Even to get comment on your post for group these days na based on connection. 😏😏💁💁🙄🙄*

21)Since I was born and now I'm getting old, I have never seen a girl taking pictures with her legs straight😂😂

22)Before you sack her because of Xmas expenses remember say January cold dey come ladies should I increase the volume?*🤓

23) Herh !!!!!! So This Big Country

NoBody Dey Repair Earpiece
😁😂

24)Girls of nowadays don't cry on the day of their wedding anymore 😥dey have wasted all the tears in their relationships* 😜😜

25)Nothing is sweeter than the first month of dating. Yuh can even sell your kidney just to make your partner happy.*🤣🤣🤣

Good evening everyone🙏

16/09/2020

Abegi oo
NEW SCAM
This one happen to me today o
Don't fall a victim ooo!!
You will never believe what happened to me today. I still can't get over it. I went to the supermarket by the road side to pick something to eat pending the time i get home. As I was walking to the counter, I noticed this woman starring at me. I looked at her and kept walking to the front to pick bottled water and gala. As I picked them and turned, I found the same woman right behind me! I tried to show her some love, so I smiled &said "Good day ma". Then I went on to get a teen bitter lemon. Can you believe the same woman followed me? I was getting a little bit nervous and mad because she was following me without saying a thing.But I tried to stay friendly, I just said "Good day maa" again. She finally responded and said, "I am sorry for starring, but you look just like my youngest son, just buried him two weeks ago" I felt silly for getting mad as I expressed my sympathy to her. She said she was fine as she knows that her Child is with the Lord. She then asked me to do her a favour whichI obliged. She said "I'm a bit sad that my child never said goodbyeto me before passing on". She said i wil do sumtin 4 her, she asked meto get in line behind her so when she's leaving the store, I should say"goodbye mum" so she could havesome sense of closure. Though her request was weird, I however agreed to grant it. So as she collected her bags from the cashier and walked away, I said "bye mum". She turned and said "bye my son".
When d cashier calculated my stuff,she said d total was N18,750. I said what!!! Can u tell me how a N50 bottled water, N50 gala and N100 teen bitter lemon equals N18,750? She said "your mum said you are paying for hers too". My mum? I shouted. That woman is not my mother ooo!!!. I quickly rushed out just in time to see the woman approaching the parking lot. I ran after her and was screaming..."excuse me, excuse me!!!". She started running. I caught up with her just before she was able to close the door of her cab.
So I kept on pulling and pulling her leg, just like I am pulling yours now! Una too like gist self. See as una serious dey read....abeg who get Nokia charger?! Make i charge my phone.

22/06/2020

Real Yoruba Ladies👧 were are you ?...
Asabi...................... The Most respectfu😎💯💖l lady
Atoke..................... The Most courageous💪✌ lady
Arike......................... The Most sweetest☺😍 lady
Asake...................... The Most kindness💯😍 lady
Awele...................... The Most lovable💖💘💯 lady
Ajoke........................ The Most hardworking💪💯💘 lady
Ajike.......................... The Most humble😍💘 lady
Asunke.......................... The Most cutest😎💯 lady
Ayoka................... The Most beautiful ✌💯lady
Anike................... The Most jealous💯✌ lady
Amoke............. The Most bold😎😊 lady
Ayole.................... The Most good character✌😇💪
Apinke........... The Most friendly💯😊 lady
Akanke........... The Most s*xy lady💘💖
Amope............. The Most supportive 💪💖ady
Adunni............ The Most faithful 💯✌lady
Abefe.................. The Most wise😇😎 lady
Abeke................ The Most funniest😊😁 lady
Akoke................ The Most adorable😍✌ lady
Aduke................... The Most charming😇💯 lady
Apeke................... The Most Intelligence😍 And Caring💯😊
Ajobi..................... The Most Endurance💯😇 And Courageous 💪Lady
Abebi....................... The Most greatest 💖lady
Ayinke................... The Most Beautiful 😆and concentrated💖😊
Awero...................... The Most coolest 💯😍lady
Aweni..................... The Most trustworthy 💖💯lady
Agbeke............... The Most luckiest✌💘 lady
Abike........The most cool😇 and focus💖💪 lady
Alake........The most tested 💪n trusted💯💖 lady
Let know the kind of lady You are!

11/03/2020

100% FACTS ONLY

1. If you are SINGLE and keep on saying "I DON'T TRUST MEN OR WOMEN!" Remember your mates are getting married every Saturday. Let me ask you, are they marrying spirits? Catch a wake up!

2. If you are MARRIED and keep saying "I HATE THIS MARRIAGE." OK! Is it not married people like you that are celebrating Gold, Silver and even Platinum jubilee?

3. If you keep on chanting, ''I'M LEAVING MY MAN, HE CHEATED ON ME" Please, go to town and see all the fine, cute, s*xy, hot, hungry and desperate chicks waiting to sn**ch your man's money and property, they don't even mind sharing. Make it work, my friend.

4. Stop saying "I HATE MY JOB" Look, 20 million people are jobless and can't even find any not to talk of keeping it. Do you want to join them?

5. You keep saying "I HATE WHERE I LIVE" Oh please! *tears* Try visiting those locations that are flooding now, people leaving in tin/zinc shacks in winter or people living/sleeping under the bridge at night and you will be grateful to God that you even have a place to stay.

6. Some say "I AM TIRED OF THIS LIFE" Well, go to the hospital and see people fighting for their lives. Go to the mortuary and take a look then tell me what you feel after that. The point is, be positive and believe in God, that's all that matters. Be Blessed.

CHERISH EVERY MOMENT OF YOUR LIFE: To realize the value of a sister/brother ask someone Who doesn't have one. To realize the value of ten years: Ask a newly divorced couple.

1. To realize the value of four years: Ask a graduate.

2. To realize the value of one year: Ask a student who Has failed a final exam. To realize the value of nine months: Ask a mother who gave birth to a stillborn.

3. To realize the value of one month: Ask a mother Who has given birth to a premature baby. To realize the value of one week: Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.

4. To realize the value of one minute: Ask a person Who has missed the train, bus or plane.

5. To realize the value of one second: Ask a person who has survived an accident.

If you are alive today, please just comment
"Thank you God"

01/02/2020

I went to a party with my gf o

Me: babe am hungry and am only holding 10naira here, should i go and tell those girls to give me food?
Girl: food? aren't you ashame of yourself?
Me: no, cause i did not kill anybody
Girl: mtcheew.. am only holding 100naira here, and is for only chewing gum ok? so controll your hunger till you get home

I just kept quiet and left, i went straight to the dancing stage, i put off my top and i tyed it round my head then i started dancing one corner with one plastic chair, i danced and danced people were spraying me money 20 20naira and 10naira, after i finish dancing they gave me different type of foods i put everything inside one big cooler, then i took it to my gf, i was seriously sweating
When i got to where my gf is, her friends started laughing at me, calling me one corner boy and also calling her iyawo one corner
I just snubed the bastards

Me: baby lets go and enjoy ourself (smiles)

Gbosa! gbosa! she gave me two dirty slaps

Should i beat her to death???

Answer me farst!!

Onishanki

17/11/2022

07/11/2022

23/07/2022

27/03/2022

12/02/2022

09/02/2022

06/04/2021

16/09/2020

22/06/2020

11/03/2020

01/02/2020

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