Amy Barg

31/07/2025

Gaps are interesting.

They are that space between...
-here and there
-what you see and what you don't
-your reality and your dreams

Sometimes people can help you fill them.

Other times... it's a job only you can do for you.

When we moved here a couple of years ago, one of the guys broke the foot off our dryer trying to get it out of the pod.

I saw him do it.

Me: Hey, you broke that foot!
Him: It weighs a lot more than I do and I had to pull on it. You can just stick it back on.

And there it was.

The gap between...
-What I thought he should do
-What he did

I knew.

I couldn't fill his accountability gap for him.
My words wouldn't make it happen.

He wasn't going to hold himself accountable for his bad decision.

Then I thought.

Don’t we all kind of do that with accountability?

It’s tough.

Because it's normal when we don’t particularly like the results we’re getting to …
-Make excuses
-Blame something or someone
-Mistakenly believe it will somehow magically get better if we just wait and hope

Being willing to live in the gap of accountability requires something.

A willingness to:
-Admit you have blind spots that you need help seeing
-Have the humility to ask for that help

Simple not easy.

“Accountability is the glue that ties commitment to the result.” -Bob Proctor

I know how hard it is to sit with myself and reflect on:
-why I didn't do what I said I wanted
-what kept me from owning my part
-my excuse that attempted to skirt the real issue

(That's a big reason I'm always honored when a client allows me to hold up their accountability mirror.)

You may have noticed that accountability has nuances to it.

As in...you may be great at it in some areas!
And in others... not so much.

What's interesting is that you probably know where you are and where you aren't.

What I know for sure about the accountability gap?

Only the very brave and the very humble are really willing to live there.

But when I see people who do live there?

They make me want to join them.

P.S. Accountability is one of four gaps in episode #127 of the Growth Mindset Matters Podcast-4 Gaps You Need To Run To and Live In.

Your willingness to run to and live in these four gaps in your life … can produce some surprisingly big benefits.

A simple acronym will help you remember them.

But it’s up to you to implement them.

24/07/2025

“A single act of courage is often the tipping point for extraordinary change.” -Andy Stanley

Yeah, so what if…every time you have that:
-difficult person
-challenging work situation
-impatience
-frustration
-disappointment..you asked yourself, “What is the single act of courage I could take right now?”

And then… you took that action.

You DID that courageous thing!

You did THAT instead of
-pushing it down?
-running from it?
-making an excuse about it?
-complaining about it?
-or wallowing in it?

I am not saying this is easy to do.

But it is within your power to do.

And here's the deal.

You know when you're being courageous or... when you're being a coward.

The beautiful result of “doing the small act of courage” thing?

You build your confidence and your belief in yourself.

It sounds so simple.
And it is.

But it's also hard.
You're the only one who can take the courageous action for you.

Here's the good news about courageous things.

They don’t have to be...
-big
-in your face
-for all the world to see
…things.

Here's the bad news.

It's easy to be oblivious to them because they are so ... obvious.

(I say more about what stops you and why this matters in episode #126 of Growth Mindset Matters Podcast, How You Can Take Control of Your Tipping Point. Listen on Apple, Spotify or at amybarg.com/podcast)

One more thing.

Most of the time...it's a lot easier to do those other things.
(push down, excuse, complain, wallow)

Where are you on the "other things vs courageous things" scale?

Your choice today... will move you one way or the other.

"Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the assessment that something else is more important than fear!” Theodore Roosevelt

What's your "something else?"

I'd be curious to know if you want to share!

17/07/2025

What if?

You just took the right action?

(I can imagine you might be rolling your eyes at that.)

But... here's why I say it.

MOST of the time you already know what the right action is.

And something.... stops you.

Maybe it's...
-fear (what if it causes pain?)
-limiting beliefs (not sure I can...)
-lack of urgency (don’t need to do it NOW)
-perfectionism (what if it’s not perfect?)
-ego (what will people think if I do this?)

There was a point on The Narrows hike recently, where Sam and I had to step into the river for the first time.

In that moment we had no idea:
-exactly what was going to happen
-how long it would take
-if we'd get hurt
-if we'd even make it to Wall Street (our goal)

The list of things that had the potential to stop us (see those above)... was long.

And while we took a lot of physical steps that day.

We had to take just as many mental ones.

When we fell (each of us did, once) we could easily have said:
that's a bad sign...
-it may get even more difficult
-better stop now and turn back

Continuing to take action that day?

It was hard.

But how we thought about it was a big part ... of what kept us moving.

NOTHING could have substituted for taking that action for those six hours.

The reward was off the charts.

What mindset do you need to address so you can take the right action that you know you need to take?

Here's why this matters.

Every time you do take that “right” action you are setting the example for everyone watching you.

Trust me on this.

Someone is always watching you...
-kids
-friends
-boss
-neighbors

And your ACTION is what they'll remember.

No one ever says,
“Hey, remember that time when you talked about
-maybe
-someday
-when everything aligns
-and the time is exactly right
... that you would XYZ?
That was AWESOME!
You saying that was so inspiring to me.
I'll never forget it!"

Yeah, no.

They’re not going to say that.

But...taking the right action?

That’s what they’ll remember.

And… it’s what you’ll remember.

I can’t tell you what area of your life.

And I can’t tell you what you need to do.

But I can tell you this.

If you will take that right action… it will make your journey better!

And when YOUR journey is better?

Those on the journey WITH you… will thank you.

Because as YOU get better… you’ll be a “better you” for them!

I'm not sure I've said this before but it's important.

Having Sam as my companion (and a community of fellow hikers doing it with us) ... is a HUGE reason I was able to complete it.

You need a companion, a community, too!
(Maybe more than you realize.)

If you're a woman and you're sensing that a right action you know you need to take is to find that community… I have one for you!

Send me a DM and I'll be in touch.

Here's what I can guarantee you.

In a community with like-minded focus you'll...
-be strengthened and encouraged to keep going
-go farther
-have someone to celebrate with you
-have better journey

That's an action everyone will celebrate!

04/07/2025

Thank goodness!

Sam and I didn't do too much research about hiking The Narrows in Zion National Park before we went.

Curious to read more after we got home, I did a search.

2,330,000 entries popped up.

I kid you not.

Things like...
-dangerous, risky
-beware of cyanotoxin exposure
-flash floods can be life-threatening
-it's like balancing on slippery bowling balls in the middle of a swiftly flowing river current.. might have been enough to keep me from doing it!

Meaning...we would have missed out on the experience of a lifetime.

It's interesting.

An abundance of information doesn't always produce great results.

Think about it.

With the abundance of information literally at your fingertips (thank you internet) are you getting only great results in every area of your life?

Probably not.
Too much information = too much overwhelm.
Too much overwhelm = you do nothing.

That abundance of information is one of three forces negatively impacting you.

You may not have even realized how much they keep you:
-stuck and stagnant
-living by default
-failing to live into your full potential

(More about all three forces in episode #123 of Growth Mindset Matters Podcast- Three Forces That Are Negatively Impacting You. Listen on Apple, Spotify or amybarg.com/podcast)

Being intentional about combating these forces is crucial.

If...

You value living by design not default.

Because these forces are designed to keep you:

-overwhelmed
-lonely
-fearful

Nothing good about that.

Here's why I'm so confident that those forces are negatively impacting you.

Growth only happens when you're uncomfortable.

But... if you're TOO uncomfortable... (due to these forces) you'll circle back to safety.

Every. Single. Time.

And you simply won't grow.

Not convinced personal growth is that big of a deal?

I searched: How can I grow as a person?
39,200,000 entries were instantly shown.

Talk about overwhelm...
(Pretty sure you're not going to sift through those.)

But... it does let you know that personal growth is a "thing" that millions are looking for and engaging in.

If you're a woman reading this... I have your "easy button" to get you started on your next phase of growth.

(And I've eliminated that abundance of information force!)

Visit amybarg.com and click on Growing on Purpose Jump Start.

No overwhelm.

Just clarity.

It could be exactly the next step you need for your growth.

Sam and I got the clarity of information we needed to successfully hike The Narrows.

And believe me... we did need SOME information about:
-Renting boots, socks and walking sticks
-Where to catch the shuttle
-How to pack food and water

Armed with that... we learned some invaluable lessons as we had an incredible experience!

I don't know where you most need to grow.

But I do know this.

-There IS an area.
-You'll have to get uncomfortable for it to happen.
-Your growth today is THE ONLY guarantee that tomorrow will be better.

I'd love to help you with that!

07/05/2025

I'm not exactly sure when I learned this.

But it's true.

You are not going to love every single thing you do every single day.

However, you need to pay attention to how often you say "yes" to this question. (Ryan Leak calls it the "fun" question.)

Am I enjoying it?

Here's why.

Enjoying some of what you're doing... some of the time, matters.

It bleeds over into other parts of your life.

Ryan suggests that being able to answer this well will help you live and lead at a higher level.

Who knew fun and enjoyment could be that important?

Isn't that just for kids?

Apparently not.

A little research revealed that FUN:
-is a feeling (not an activity)
-produces a visceral sense of radiance (in people having it)
-involves playfulness, a sense of connection, and a state of flow

That was super encouraging to me.

And... it reminded me.

One place I worked the small team I was on got moved into a tiny office space with no windows.
Definitely NOT fun.

On a dull, quiet afternoon my boss started throwing small wads of paper over the cube wall that separated our desks.

Clearly NOT what I expected.
And for the next several minutes we pelted each other back and forth.

Definitely FUN.

Simple.
Unexpected.
Playful.

That was decades ago, and I still remember it.

She created something we could enjoy.

She could have just as easily complained about our situation.

Complaining comes pretty naturally to most people.

Think about how often you hear someone complain about their:
- job
-health
-relationship
-dislike of the weather

Those folks don't seem to enjoy much of anything.

And because they're not... everyone around them senses that.

Ever given much thought to where you are on the complaining-enjoyment continuum in life?

Might be worth it.

“Complaining robs you of energy you could be using to contribute. And you need to protect your energy because whatever you put energy towards gets the most wins.” -Ryan Leak

I'll quickly add...life comes with plenty of "not fun" challenges.

But.

Just because something is challenging doesn't mean you need to complain about it.

Another option?

Give yourself permission to enjoy the journey.
Celebrate who you can become because you're willing to engage in it!

Easy to do?
Nope.

Worth it?
All day long.

“If your current situation is
-stretching your capacity
-helping you grow

-and causing you to think about what’s possible in your life…
Be grateful for that opportunity. Your growth hinges on your perspective of what’s difficult.” ~ Ryan Leak

Complaining less and enjoying more WILL uplevel your life (and your leadership).

And... a rising tide lifts all boats!
(For more tips on fun check out episode #115 for the Growth Mindset Matters Podcast on Apple, Spotify or at amybarg.com/podcast)

24/04/2025

Levels.
You know them when you see them in
-sports
-cars
-even grocery stores

But what about levels... in life?

Not necessarily career and finances (although that could be a part of it).

More the level at which you show up... in life.

Ryan Leak talked about this recently.

Four questions to live at a different level.

Here's one he called the self-awareness question.

What's it like to be on the other side of me?

I thought, depends on who you ask.
(i.e. dentist vs your spouse)

I then thought... who really asks that question?

Has anyone ever asked you that?

If so, you might think:
-Do they really want to know?
-Will there be retaliation if I'm honest?

Ryan said, “One person might say it’s inspiring to be on the other side of you and another might say it’s intimidating.”

Realizing that you may come across in different ways might be a hard pill to swallow.

You might...

Dig your heels in and say, “I am NOT like that!"

He suggested this strategy (that demonstrates "intellectual humility.")

Hey, I could be wrong but…

- from my perspective that meeting was not as productive as we had hoped it would be

Hey, I could be wrong but…

- I thought we had agreed to spend part of tomorrow morning cleaning out the garage

Here's the kicker.

“If you can’t say ‘Hey I could be wrong,’ you’ll NEVER say:
-I was wrong.
-I am wrong.
-I'll own that." ~Ryan Leak

Saying (and meaning) those statements goes a LONG way toward becoming more self-aware.

In her book, Healthy Conflict, Peaceful Life, Donna Jones says,

“THE most important ingredient to a healthy relationship is an attitude of humility … that must permeate our heart, mind and soul. Two humble people can work through just about any conflict life can dish out. Humility is not a mark of weakness but a mark of strength. Biblical humility doesn’t make us doorMATS for exploitation but doorWAYS for conversation.”

(For my real life example check out this week's episode of Growth Mindset Matters Podcast.)

Ok, so not a “life and death” example.

But… isn’t that the way with most of the things that happen in our lives?

They aren't life or death…

They're little things that turn into big things when we fail to

-Stay humble
-Imagine what it’s like to be on the other side of us
-Ask for another person’s perspective

Here’s the deal.
You can’t "do self-awareness”… by yourself.

Trying to… is like refusing to look in the mirror your friend is holding up because you’re sure the dirt smudge she's telling you she sees on your face, isn’t there.

Your denial doesn’t change the reality.

So, who do you need to ask, “what’s it like to be on the other side of me?”

What stops you from asking?

How you answer that… will tell you something about your belief about how you are coming across to others!

Because the more you think, “I’m good,” the less likely you are to ask.

Living at a different level requires a willingness to do something differently.

Asking this self-awareness question… is a great place to start!

27/02/2025

What if... you thought about your life as a "personal" business?
-calculating where you're producing a great ROI
-actions that are negatively influencing your P & L statement
-staying afloat or going under.. as a human.

Here's a grim statistic.
According to 2024 data from the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics,
49.4% of businesses fail in their first 5 years
65.3% fail in their first 10 years

Obviously, you've made it that long physically.
But what about:
-emotionally?
-relationally?
-spiritually?

This month marks a decade for me having my own "business" business.

Reflecting on that, some mindset lessons have surfaced.

I've realized that what has helped me in my business has also helped me in my life.

This might help you.

When I first started my business, I spent a LOT of time learning.

Quickly went from: I don't know what I don't know.
To: WOW... I know that I NEED to know!

I determined to do what my mentors said.
That would be "the ticket."

Except it wasn't.

What I experienced was:
-shifting
-making changes
-quitting some things
-trying new things..so that I could keep going.

One day I discovered this.

Marry the goal, date the plan.

Meaning...
-don’t lose sight of where you’re heading
-but don’t be afraid to take a different route

Thinking something has to happen:
-THIS exact way
-There’s NO changing
-NO flexibility.. might end up being "the death of you."

Like the story of the guy who refused all efforts to rescue him as the flood waters rose around his roof.

In heaven (after drowning) he challenged God, "You were supposed to save me."

God replied, "I tried. You refused all the help I sent."

He ignored Brian Tracy's advice: “Be clear about your goal, but be flexible about your process of achieving it.”

I have dated my plan…a LOT in this decade of doing business.

Like any dating experience… some of the dates have been more productive and enjoyable than others.

Nonetheless… I continue to keep this mindset truth top of mind!

And it has helped to keep me … from becoming one of those grim statistics!

I’m still here doing it.

(My "date the plan" mindset is one of five I'm sharing in this week's episode of the Growth Mindset Matters Podcast-on Apple, Spotify or at amybarg.com/podcast)

Here's why I think this could matter for you.

You wouldn’t judge a newborn for all it can’t do (crawl, walk, run).

But you would have thoughts about an adult … who insisted on crawling everywhere because their fear of falling if they walked, was just “too much” to try to face.

As ridiculous as that sounds… it is highly likely that there is SOME area of your life where you're doing that.

Where “what you are thinking” (your mindset) IS keeping you crawling.

When you were MADE to walk and maybe even run!

I say that because
-I’ve done it
-and I’ve seen my clients do it.

But… there is hope when you’re willing to take an honest look at where you may be doing that.

If you're not?

There may be something else you're married to...

23/01/2025

When was the last time you made progress on something....

-at work
-in your workouts
-with a family member
..and you actually took time to “celebrate” what you did?

Most don't.

They win and immediately move on to what's next.

Life is busy.

There's more to do.

Here's the deal.

Research says that recognizing small successes activates the brain's reward system, which releases dopamine and reinforces positive behavior.

(It's why games on your phone are so addicting.
Every success is rewarded.)

But here's some surprising news.

You can create your own dopamine hit by taking a minute to celebrate your progress in ANY area of life.

And making progress... leads to being more highly engaged in whatever it is you're doing.

For me, this week... that "making progress thing" is the 100th episode of my podcast-Growth Mindset Matters!

I've learned many lessons after doing 100 episodes.

Here are three of them.

#1 Keep Adjusting
#2 Keep Persisting
#3 Keep Investing

And I realize that just reading those words probably won't change your life.

But.... listening to the episode to hear:
-what caused the lessons
-the questions posed for you
-the examples applicable to you
.. has the potential to (at the very least) nudge you to think about your life.

(You can listen on Apple, Spotify or at amybarg.com/podcast)

Even if you don't listen... consider this.

An easy way to "up the ante" on your celebration of making progress about something you care about is to think about:

-why you've been able to make the progress
-how many obstacles you've overcome to keep "doing the thing"
-what the positive impact to others has been because of it

That matters.

It's like you giving your own brain the dopamine hit that says...

-Yea you!
-Look at how well you've done!
-Look at how far you've come!
-You can do hard things, and it is worth it!

Or... you can hurry past the celebration and wonder why you are burned out.

As with all things that are growth-related... the choice is always yours.

And your choices... make you.

The degree to which you're willing to slow down long enough to celebrate your progress has a real impact on your ability to continue to make progress.

If you've never considered the correlation between celebration and continued progress... maybe now is the time.

I AM... choosing to celebrate!

I'd love for you to join me.

And if you feel inclined to send me a "Woo Hoo for 100" I'll happily receive it as a dopamine hit from you.

Even better... go listen to the 100th episode and leave me a 5 star review. :)

That will be a DOUBLE DOPAMINE for me!

And you might be surprised at what it does for you.

31/10/2024

Imagine going out into your backyard and digging one shovelful of dirt.

If you did that every day for..... a month you'd have a hole

If you did it every day for a year you'd have a pit.

Ok, you'd probably never do that.
At least not with a shovel and dirt.

But.... you do it more than you realize.

With negative thinking.

"If you think a negative thought for 15 seconds, it is really easy to then think another and another and another. It's called thought stacking." -Ed Mylett

Statistics report that 80 percent of our thoughts are negative and 95 percent of our thoughts are repetitive.

Those repetitive negative thoughts can create quite a pit in our minds.

And just like you'd need help to get out of a pit dug with a shovel, you need help for the one in your mind.

Here are three useful tools.

-Lead Coat (refuse to wear them)
-Pennies (remember to pick them up)
-Ladder (resolve to climb them)

Sounds crazy, I know, but they work when you know how to use them.
(For more on the first two check out episode 88 of the Growth Mindset Matters podcast on Apple, Spotify or at amybarg.com/podcast)

Here's #3-Ladders.

They can be game changers.

But.

A ladder leaned against the side of the house won't clean the gutter.
The only way it serves you is if you are willing to climb it.

Here's what happens with your thinking.

You stay stuck saying things like:
-This is awful
-It is always going to be like this
-I am never going to get out of this mess
-No matter what I try it won't work

And each stacked, negative thought is like:
-rolling out the rug
-hanging pictures on the wall
-setting up the sofa
...in your pit of thinking.

You’ve officially decorated your pit so you can live there.

It might even begin to feel comfy.

But here's the challenge.

The more decorated your pit... the harder it can be to leave it.

Even if someone gently lowers you a ladder, you might not be willing to climb.

That ladder could be there all day long (strong and sturdy) and do you absolutely no good.

The reality is…you're the only one who can lift your foot to that first rung.

Falling into a pit in your thinking is normal when you have a:

-challenging work situation
-difficult relationship issue
-self-esteem problem
-(add your own situation here)

Decorating it and living there is a choice.

Resolving to climb the ladder might be
-talking with a friend
-getting counseling
-reading a positive book (High Road Leadership is a great choice)
-listening to episode 88 for the other two "pit protectors"

Here's the good news.
Once you've climbed the ladder out of one pit:

-You can do it again
-You get faster at climbing
-You're less likely to decorate down there

Save your decorating energy for the place you do want to live!

23/10/2024

23/10/2024

I've officially reached the summit of the "rebrand the podcast mountain!"
(And yes, it has taken a lot longer than I anticipated.)

It's ok.

I've been growing.

But oh wow....it feels amazing to be celebrating:

-Fabulous help and unwavering support I received from Matt, Tamara, Kevin, Rachelle and Sam
-EVERYONE who voted on the new name and image
-The perseverance to hang in there and not give up
-Growth Mindset Matters is finally LIVE and ready for you on Apple & Spotify!

If you'd be willing to celebrate with me... I'd love it if you'd:

-Listen to the trailer (2 minutes)
-Listen to the first episode - Welcome to Growth Mindset Matters-No More Groundhog Day! ( #87)
-Leave a 5 Star Rating (if you believe it's worth it)
-Write a brief comment or review (wherever you listen)
-Follow or Subscribe (so you never miss an episode)
-Share the show (with someone you know)

Ok, I realize I just asked you to do six things (probably breaking some cardinal rule of marketing).

When you're excited... you get carried away.

I am.

I did.

Do what you can. :)

My "it would be fabulous goal" is 100 plays.

My "this is an absolute miracle goal" is 500 plays!

Your help means more than you know.

I can't do it without you.

Thank you in advance.

"Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all others." -Cicero

I'm so grateful for your help!