16/04/2026
An educator said this to me recently—
feeling deeply frustrated.
She’d spent time carefully setting up the environment…
trying to create something calm, engaging, beautiful.
And then in a moment of frustration—
he snapped it, threw it, broke it.
And it felt like:
👉 he was doing it on purpose
👉 he didn’t respect anything
👉 everything was being ruined
It’s exhausting.
But this isn’t about the toy.
This is what it looks like when a child has a feeling
that feels too big to hold.
As educators, our role goes far beyond phonics and maths.
It’s to meet the child where they are—
and support them with what they don’t yet know how to do.
Because they don’t have the words to say:
“I’m frustrated”
“I’m overwhelmed”
“I need help”
So it comes out through their body instead.
Breaking. Throwing. Snapping.
Not because they want to ruin things…
but because they don’t yet know what to do with what they feel.
⸻
In the moment, keep it simple. Calm. Clear.
🤍 “I can’t let you break the toys.”
🤍 “You’re feeling really cross.”
Then give the feeling somewhere to go:
• stomp feet
• squeeze a cushion
• rip paper
• throw something soft
• go outside and move
👉 You’re not stopping the feeling
👉 You’re showing them how to handle it
⸻
And this is where everything begins to shift.
Because when we focus only on the toys, the set-ups, the activities—
we miss the part that actually holds it all together.
The emotional climate.
The tone we bring.
The pace we hold.
The way we respond in these exact moments.
When that feels calm, steady and predictable—
children don’t need to show us their feelings in the same way.
And this is the deeper work I support educators with inside my Hygge in the Early Years™ Training.
Not just what to say in the moment—
but how to create an environment where children feel safe enough to feel…
without everything around them falling apart.
A way of working that feels calmer, simpler, and more connected—
for you and for them 🤍
